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14/11/2005
She introduced me to her gay nephew who visited irregularly throughout the summer. Mac hated this young man who wore his suit jacket over his shoulders, smelled of perfume, and read Anais Nin. She arranged a date between us, and we sat in the borrowed car for a respectable amount of time before returning, aware that we were thrown together for a purpose but not yet having words to share our longings. I didn't call myself gay yet. For three years I had been making love to my best friend Roz Rabinowitz with my mouth, and I knew the word Lesbian, but I was terrified of its implications and could not say it.

~Joan Nestle, "Liberties not Taken", A Restricted Country, 1987

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