Still Complicated

Belonging to a ‘straight community’

Overall, a smaller proportion of bi+ people in 2022 identified with the straight/heterosexual community than in the 2013 survey. Those who felt that they were ‘not at all’ part of a straight/heterosexual community increased from 30% to 48%. Conversely, those who feel ‘quite a lot’ part of such a community went down to 15% (from 25%) and those who felt ‘very much so’ were now 5% instead of 7%. Lastly, those who felt ‘a little’ part of a straight/heterosexual community were now 32%, down from 39%.

Looking at comments from bi+ people suggests that a possible reason for the trend of feeling less a part of any straight community, is that to be part of it, you must appear straight and conform to gender norms. In other words, due to erasure rather than inclusion. “Fitting in” or “passing” can be detrimental to the affirmation of people’s sexuality or gender. Over half of the comments mentioned people making assumptions based on their relationship status and/or assumed gender presentation.

“I’m quite straight presenting so I am assumed to be this even if I don’t identify with it.”

“I don’t feel I belong – even though I am perceived as straight when people find out my partner is male. I don’t really connect with it all.”

“While I believe I benefit from being cis and hetero passing at work, I feel that this is due to elements of bi erasure, and also cisnormative assumptions. I think this is the reason I don’t feel part of hetero community.”

“I am assumed to be cisgender and heterosexual nearly all the time, which is frustrating and tiresome.”

“As my gender identity is read as ‘woman’ to most cishet folk, and I’m married to a cis man, I get accepted into the straight community by default, and I end up feeling like an imposter.”